Ask Godric
by totallybob
Summary: Ever wanted to ask Godric Anything? well now you can! because i'm keeping him hostage in my living room! im pimp like that... I also do co-stars so there will be other characters!
1. Chapter 1

Totallybob: hey people! This is just a ask Godric what ever you want sort of thing, so I ask you *points at audience.* fellow people! Have you ever wondered ANYTHING about Godric? Or Eric? Or anything! Hey vampires and older fake vampires have similarities too! Sure the mirror thing was wrong but so what! I make Mr. Emo over there answer any of your questions!

Godric: I don't have to answer anything…

Totallybob: oh yes you do, or I won't let you meet the sun!

Godric: you should respect your elders… and besides I'm older than Jesus you can't make me do anything!

Totallybob: oh bite me, I can do what ever I want you to do, I can make you drink my blood and you know it!

Godric: pshh…

Totallybob: baby… anyway! We will have co-stars if requested in the comment section soooo comment! And I will mention names…. Because I like names….

Need 5 comments! Good comments! Flames will be used to burn Godric after I'm done with him! Oh and I was thinking tying Steve Newland to the chair to have people rant on him if nobody asks me for a co-star…..

COMMENT!

AGAIN NEED 5


	2. Chapter 2

Totallybob: Yay reviews!

Godric: mhmm…

Totallybob: Godric!

Godric: fine fine yay hurray… vampires are soupossed to be dead anyway…

Tot: shut up emo.

Godric: im not… hey why'd you change your name?

GodricIsMine: what like this?

Godric: im not yours!

Totallybob: you are if you wanna go free.

Godric: fine… so… can I change mine?

Totallybob: yea why not…

TotallybobTotallysucks: hows this?

Totallybob: ok! No changing names anymore! And change your back! It sucks as much as you do.

Godric: fine… hey weren't we soupossed to do something?

Totallybob: what?

Godric: *cough* story *cough*

Totallybob: Aww your getting sick!

Godric: THE STORY!

Totallybob: oh right, could have told me before… he he sorry folks… OK first up is Noctis108

Godric: *reads comment* ok she or he said…

Omg this is so cool. LOL. OKay hold on imma ask like a whole bunch since this is just rp anyway...or do you really have him hostage? Okay here we go.

1.) What do you, Godric, prefer? Women or men?

2.) Have you ever been embarrassed during your vampiric life?

Totallybob: yes! I have him hostage! And he is totally gay.

Godric: whats a LOL? And Respect your elders by shutting up! I can leave when ever I want… im just… kinda tied up right now…

Totallybob: yea tied up with silver…

Godric: … all right first anwer is…

Totallybob: *drum rolls with fingers*

Godric: I'm whatever the mood strikes me.

Totallybob: good job for being honest!

Godric: yea now can you put down the silver cross?

Totallybob: answer the next question first.

Godric: I'm too old for this crap… and sadly yes I have been embarrassed before… but its only how blood makes my breath smell, I'm constantly having to chew on Mentos, The fresh maker *wiggles eyebrows*, oh and I also have a fascination with small furry kittens…

Totallybob: hmm… um… small helpless furry kittens for the win. You're so pimp… NOT.

Godric: yes child your quite funny.

Totallybob: Next question!

Godric: *reads question*

DemonickittyFYI: could , would you invite me to one of your prtys? sorry my key is br

Totallybob: HELLZ YEA!

Godric: No.

Totallybob: yes

Godric: No.

30 minutes later…

Godric: fine if it can get you to shut up…

Totallybob: mwhahaha I always win!

Godric:yes child whatever you wish to think. On to the next question…

DarkAngel620-

Oh the possibilities!

1) What, Godric, is the stupidest thing you have every done? Please describe what & why.

2) Would you ever consider letting your hair grow out again? (He did have this WAY hotter thing about it)

3) Would you laugh if you found out a child drowned in a tiolet? cuz i did

4) Has there ever been a time after you made Eric that you two were just traveling along, walking through a town or something, and saw somebody and looked at Eric, then at them, then at Eric then at them, and thought "God damn it! I coulda just waited for THAT, but nooooo! *sulks*"?

...and just for the hell of it...

BONUS:

- On a scale of 1 - 10, do you consider this pencil *holds up pencil from nowhere* and 11?

Godric: *sighs* lets get this over with….

well… I took off my shoes once… to catch up to a rouge vampire, that had a bounty on his head, and right when I took them off, I slipped on my face… then again there was that time when a human caught me and chained me up for questioning *Cough* totallybob *cough* … her and her stupid cat… and I don't even like that kitten… anymore… But I think my most embarrassing was… when Eric walked in on me when he was a young vampire and he walked in on me and some Swedish woman and she was tied to the pole… that's probably why sookie complained to me about her running into the basement, only to find Eric doing the same thing… My child takes after me.

Yes because right when I get out of this hell hole instead of going straight to the sun I'll wait a couple of years until I look just right for the occasion and… actually…. Maybe… ok fine, I would look nice…

I used to…. But then-

Totallybob: he got emo.

Yea I got emo… wait what?

Totallybob: next question mongrel!

Every day. Why do you think I wanted to meet the sun? yes partly cause vampires shouldn't exist, but have you seen the woman these days? I don't even remember why I turned him.

Bonus.) totallybob: wow that's a long pencil… longer than godrics… like how my dirty mind works? 10!

Godric: 5 because of totallybob… wait…. Stop! Put it down! Fine 10! 10!

Totallybob: good boy! *puts down silver chainsaw*

Godric: *shivers* ok next question is….

Anonymous-

If you were some how granted one day in the sun (without harm of course) what would you do?

Totallybob: that's a good question…

Godric: easy I would do the following…

Leave a message on Eric's phone laughing at him, that he's powerless and that I'm screwing sookie

Fly around, saying I'm superman

Make a treaty with werewolves.

Burn all my paperwork so I don't have to do it.

Take a beautiful woman *winks at fangirls* out on a date saying this one day is just for them.

Try and turn a straight man gay

And last adopt 20 kitties and hide them from Eric.

Next question!

Totallybob: this is the tale of captain jack sparrow! Pirate so brave on the seven seas!

Godric: what?

Totallybob: mystical clash to the island of tortuga! Raven like sway on a island so sweet!

Godric: that was gay.

Totallybob: like eric gay or…?

Godric: I meant odd, you have much to learn.

Totallybob: please you couldn't even get your phone working so you could call 911. Never mind next question milady .

Godric: Child! How dare you- (one mean stare and chopping garlic later.) Next… question.

*Godric reads yet again as Totallybob puts on his fake pink glasses, that had Barbie on it.*

Right…

Saoirse agus amach wrote…

Did you kind of laugh pompously when the bulk of Europe was killed during the Plague?

- Or did you nearly starve because of the tainted food

supply?

- When you first heard about Jesus, did you think, "Copycat,I rose from the dead first"

- What is you biggest *facepalm* moment?

yea… I was right next to him, and I laughed my but off as you people call it, I finally got to be in the papers though.

I didn't starve because I don't eat! *cries in corner* but the people tasted like bad… stuff… It made me week for two days one night three hours and four seconds.

Well… I didn't hear about him until after words… I actually had a vampire companion (not my child) and when we finally heard we went to examine him but when we found him he was nailed to a cross. I had to pull my companion off of Jesus for she started licking his carcass, that's what copy caters get.

Yes, it was when I first met totallybob here, I actually was on my way to see the church, to as totallybob calls it emo myself to them and so I did not take this car thing for I have no idea how to drive, and I was walking the opposite direction in vampire speed and I got out of the state before I looked around to see a mysterious sex- I mean hideous woman! And she told me I was going the wrong way after that she told me I could stay at her place and so I did to avoid my ahem… peeps… from fining me, she was on her computer and she asked my name when I said Godric well… here I am now. There was also the time when, I was training eric and I didn't really want him to turn to the gay side so I told him woman only then I went to a ummm bar and eric followed me, when I changed him he did lose only one memory and that was the difference between men and woman and since we were at a all guy bar he took three to him bed and he brought them to me proudly saying he lost his vampire virginity to woman when I checked to see if they were dead I saw they were all men and that's when I had a "facepalm."

Totallybob hey…. In first story you were about to call me something!

Godric: human. You are stupid.

Totallybob: what was it?

Godric: nothing! Well great chapter folks!

Totallybob: but… oh well… Yea thanks for all the wonderful review, and I will enjoy torturing Godric!

5 reviews!

Co-star ideas?

Plz guys bye for now!

Godric: see you later beautiful humans. *winks*


End file.
